And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
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the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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