I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
