i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
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Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
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I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.