Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease. http://tfl.nu/084h
  Replies (9) Good night (2118) Bad night (2744)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same http://tfl.nu/ozek
  Replies (40) Good night (2395) Bad night (6946)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes http://tfl.nu/n4pv
  Replies (11) Good night (3808) Bad night (1007)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  ...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): ...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates. http://tfl.nu/314n
  Replies (9) Good night (1057) Bad night (2836)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up. http://tfl.nu/1td0
  Replies (4) Good night (2014) Bad night (1374)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history. http://tfl.nu/x6ei
  Replies (13) Good night (803) Bad night (1654)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (559): He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year http://tfl.nu/93v6
  Replies (8) Good night (1345) Bad night (766)
• Favorite

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (580): Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come?? http://tfl.nu/rcqs
  Replies (7) Good night (1188) Bad night (563)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (563): I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you? http://tfl.nu/ipj5
  Replies (7) Good night (1322) Bad night (473)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault. http://tfl.nu/0avq
  Replies (1) Good night (756) Bad night (401)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke http://tfl.nu/er3q
  Replies (3) Good night (559) Bad night (357)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up. http://tfl.nu/cdkq
  Replies (4) Good night (868) Bad night (347)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood? http://tfl.nu/xtqf
  Replies (3) Good night (569) Bad night (224)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you? http://tfl.nu/752k
  Replies (4) Good night (618) Bad night (250)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no. http://tfl.nu/59ld
  Replies (1) Good night (605) Bad night (265)

Randomize