So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
