Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
