some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
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we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
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I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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