So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
