saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
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