I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
