google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize