No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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