It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
