I got chris browned last night
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
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I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
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