yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
it glows. i had to have it.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
