:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
