She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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