Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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