so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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