Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
