Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
