I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
