yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
