i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize