I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
