I want to stick my p in your. b.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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