Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
