White coat. Heels.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize