my sisters under your porch take her home
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
