Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
there was a trapeze. enough said
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
