Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize
