My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
