your room smells of hookers.
And success
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
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