Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize