SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
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