i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
so let's talk penis.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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