I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Randomize