Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
