what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
