I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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