But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
