Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Randomize
