YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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