summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
You may now shotgun with the bride
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize
