Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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