i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
