Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
