i just google imaged poop.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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