I hope mine doesn't look like that
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I want you more than these girls want KFC
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I think my moral compass just broke
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize