Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
