the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
