More tranny stories later!
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
