yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
