I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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